whadddddup

thank god spring break is over. i did horrible, even though i did have a few good days. monday was bad. bad bad bad. fuck whatever. but tuesday was better. wednesday consisted of coffee and more coffee. yummy. good day. thursday was another alright night. i managed the gym wooohooo. friday i got black out wasted and puked EVERYTHING i had eaten that day. it was like a win lose situation. I'm not really sure actually. haha wow okay. saturday was another wasted night but i didn't throw up (??) today was good. I've had chicken (200c) and went to the gym and ran for 30 minutes (340c) so today was a good start to the week. I've been scaring myself lately though. like.... all i think about is food. food food food food food. what am i going to eat (what am i not going to eat) my dad asked me if i was eating the other day. yes dad... (lie) everyday (another lie) he's noticed that I've been tired lately. from over 1,000 miles away he's noticed that I've been tired. i must really suck at being sneaky (actually I'm really good at being sneaky) I'm feeling a 45 min run tomorrow morning. breakfast... i don't know too many things in my pantry, fridge, and freezer. something low calorie but yummy. womppp i don't know i don't know. i have a jacket on... its 81 outside. i am also writing with all my friends around ahh nerve-wracking but whatever i really had to write. I'm high as fuck right now. lol i wonder who else is a disordered eating stoner. thats a club me and a girl i know on tumblr created. hahaha wow what a lame thing oh well. my friend called me fat the other day. i wanted to cry right in the middle of the store...

okay so i just like got up and went into my room and locked the door hahah. I'm so ratchet. they probably think I'm smoking (my friends are some real potheads) okay anyway, i don't what else i want to write about. but i need to find a buddy. I'm a good buddy so if you need one, let me know! haha okay so I'm going to go drink some tea and enjoy my last day before college starts!

think think!